I feel like screaming

Those of us with chronic illnesses are used to two distinctly different receptions at hospitals, clinics, emergency rooms and primary care providers. This dichotomous reaction often leaves us frustrated to the point of tears, because we know something's wrong with our bodies, but we don't usually know what is wrong.

The first reception is the overwhelmingly pleasant surprise when a doctor, nurse, or other healthcare professional recognizes our plight, and treats us with dignity. These healthcare workers tend to ask reasonable, chronological questions to help parse new symptoms from chronic symptoms. They also tend to ensure that their prescriptions are personalized to our health needs, so we recover as quickly as possible.

That was not my reception at the ER tonight.

I've been sick for three weeks with a severe upper respiratory infection. It started out with symptoms similar to laryngitis (sore throat, post nasal drip, yada yada). When I started feeling worse a week later, I went in, expecting to be diagnosed with bronchitis or a sinus infection. Much to my chagrin, my primary care provider could not see me, and I saw a resident instead. While I have the utmost respect for all healthcare workers, this particular resident accidentally prescribed me amoxicillin (regular) instead of Augmentin (combo). While my infection did not evolve into pneumonia, thanks to the amoxicillin, my sinus infection got considerably worse, and I called to make an appointment with my doctor a week later. They sent me to the emergency room, where I met an amazing nurse practitioner, who was familiar with my particular immunodeficiency condition, and who made sure I had steroids to reduce the inflammation in my chest, and the rest of my body.

That was two Fridays ago. Last Friday, I was not recovering well, after sleeping for the entire week, so I called my doctor again in the morning to make a same-day appointment. Again, she could not see me, so she sent me to the ER. I saw the same amazing NP, who extended my antibiotics and upped my steroids.

However, the inflammation has continued to get worse. Needless to say, I've been in bed for about 10 days now. My chest pain and pressure is still increasing, and I've started retaining water. I've gained at least 5 pounds of water weight in 1-2 days. I sweat constantly, and it's difficult to eat or drink. I have a headache, I'm dizzy, and today my feet were so swollen that I couldn't put my tennis shoes on. If you Google the symptoms, you'll get acute renal insufficiency or heart trouble. But the truth is that it's inflammation, plain and simple. Because of my allergy to OTC non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, there is nothing that I can do at home to reduce the swelling.

So I did the one thing I knew I'd be instructed to do, if I called in to get an appointment with those specific symptoms. I went to the ER. The VA doesn't take chest pain in young females lightly.

When I arrived, I got treated as if I was a hypochondriac having a panic attack. My blood pressure was 130/74 (normal - 105/60). My heart rate was still in an irregular sinus tachycardia, and I was so distressed that I couldn't read or play on my phone. I could barely talk to the doctor because of shortness of breath. He listened to my lungs and heart and sent me home in tears.

So tomorrow I get to call the appointment line and BEG them not to tell me to go to the ER. And I get to do it all without sleep, because doctors no longer believe in pain medicine other than NSAIDs, which I'm allergic to.

I feel like screaming.